Reflection

Today I spent the better part of 7 hours working on my book. I have written over 70 pages to date and late tonight have been working on editing. This has resulted in me reading several journal entries from the past 2 years. Reflection. I sometimes wonder why I feel tired, and why I sometimes feel as if I have hurdled more obstacles than there could be placed in my path.

In the last 2 years – 2 spine surgeries, multiple knee surgeries, a 3:16 marathon 8 months post anterior/posterior spinal fusion, the loss of loved ones, and learning by witnessing Alzheimer disease slowly distance my Grandma from what she knew. Plus job changes, awesome friendships, an ever supporting coach, supportive doctors, and Faith so strong that it has been my survival tool through the darkest moments and it has carried me effortlessly through the most joyous accomplishments. So many have no idea that the most simple things in life are miracles in my eyes.

What I have discovered is that I don’t run for exercise, I don’t run for the fact that it makes me a healthier person, and I don’t run to beat the person up ahead (even though I really like when I do). I run because it represents a freedom and accomplishment, it shows to others that with perseverance and determination one can achieve so much more that they may think. I run because I know what it feels like to not having feeling in your legs and I run because there was a moment when I was told, there is no reasoning of why you were not paralyzed below the waist. I run because God created me to run and cherished me with that gift. It is for God that I run and not for myself. There is no outlet like running long distances and each step represents an obstacle overcome.

There are times in life when the hurdles seem to high to jump and the waters seem to large to cross. It is these times that you must surrender. You must realize who you are, whom stands behind you holding you up and believing in you, and what you hope to achieve; but then you must step back and let God guide you in the path he has created for you. In reality, life is not a destination it is an experience and a journey. Dear God, this journey I’m on sure has a lot of steep hills but I have faith and trust in your will for me.

I move forward, praying for courage and understanding.

“Faith is the substance of all things unseen” – Ryan Hall

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