I have always said this blog is 100% honest. Guess we are all human after all.
Well, it’s the weekend. A lot of my friends are out training and competing and I’m feeling empty. A little tired, a lot stressed, and really missing my passions. If I wasn’t honest with you, it would not be fair. Many ask how can I stay so positive? For the most part, because I know the fear of not having function in my leg. BUT, weekends are tough and there are minutes each week that are very dark. I so miss not being able to train right now. I love training even more than competing. I feel empty without. Today I am feeling really empty. I so want to just relax but it is at those times I realize the journey ahead and the adversity I must overcome. The fear of the future but also excitement for what the future might hold. Faith has helped so much in getting me through the scariest of times and the frustration of not being capable of living my dreams. Today I am headed out to see a long time friend and mentor. Plus it will be in surroundings I grew up around. Excited!
I did get the opportunity to use the anti-gravity treadmill on Friday. Felt great. The week days are much easier as I am so busy with training clients and my own training at Froedtert Sports Med. (surrounded by awesome support and motivation)!
There is no doubt that without the awesome support from friends, coaches, family, Dr.’s, and my faith, I would have NEVER gotten through all of this. So that really keeps me going. But it’s not all smiles. Rehab. is tough right now, more mentally than physically. I find days of doubt and then during the week moments of belief. I am excited about balancing out my passions and can not wait until I am back in action. We certainly forget how passionate we are about something until it is taken, it is then that we take a step back and look at why we are so passionate.
I know that the coming weeks will be tough but I will take them as I took training for the next big race. One foot in front of the other with determination and courage.
I am super excited for some time with GREAT friends tomorrow afternoon celebrating Memorial Day and those that have given so much for our freedom. I am very grateful for what I do have and pray for those that are going through difficult times. I do understand and hope I can motivate and inspire those through adversity.
Have a wonderful Memorial Day Weekend and remember… it’s not all smiles but it’s the journey and small accomplishments that make us so strong and powerful.